At age 81, Mom had a massive stroke which left her completely unable to speak and totally paralyzed on her right side. I could not let this vibrant, artistic, articulate lady remain locked inside her own body. I had to do something! |
Thus began an incredible journey of love and tears, defeat and shining success achieved through her undauntable spirit that simply refused to give up, and my determination to do everything possible - even the impossible, if that's what it took to help her. A powerful story of tremendous courage and effort in an age and at an age when anyone else would not even have tried. This story was written in June 1997 when we were still living the story. Mom went to live with the Lord Jesus six months later on January 16, 1998. I have not attempted to rewrite the story to reflect that, but have printed it here just as it was originally written. This will not be an easy story for me to relive as grief lessens, but it never ceases. My purpose in sharing it is to inspire other adult children to love their elderly parents every moment possible and never assume that because they are not all that they once were due to mental and physical aging, that they have lost their dignity or their desires to live life as fully as possible. No one wants to spend endless days, weeks, months, or years sitting alone in a nursing home staring at the walls and out the windows! Mom's eternal soul will be blessed if this story encourages other struggling stroke victims and their families and friends. Daughter Lin |
Journey of Joy by Lin LaTrajet Copyright 1997 |
Each of us is only one heartbeat away from eternity. We never think when we get out of bed to start another new day what might happen that will forever alter our lives. Dwelling fully in each moment of life would be the best we could do, but we do it so feebly, so mindlessly, never truly grateful for how precious it is. Rarely are we aware that all of life is constant, inexorable change. June 5, 1995, in one heartbeat of time, Mom's life changed forever. So did mine. June 5, 1997 is the second anniversary of Mom's stroke which left her completely paralyzed on the right side. Neither she, the doctors, nor anyone else even expected her to live. I was working out of town nearly 90 miles away when the stroke hit her like unexpected lightning on that cloudless, summery Monday. I had been with her just the day before: We'd gone to church and then I'd fixed her favorite Sunday dinner of salmon, broccoli, and mashed potatoes with chocolate cream pie for dessert. We did her grocery shopping in the late afternoon, then went for a ride which she loved to do since she had never been a driver. At the nearby lake, we ate ice cream cones while we enjoyed the beauty of sunshine dappling the lake water through giant evergreens. She was feeling fine: No weakness or chest pains, no debilitating arthritis agony. We enjoyed our day together, and I had happy thoughts as I made the long drive home. There were other things I could have done with my weekend. I had just recently moved, started a new job, and was excited to explore my new surroundings. Always though, in the back of my mind was the idea that Mom and I didn't have forever to be together here on earth. My Dad had died eight years before, and I had lived too far away to spend much time with him in his last few years. I still missed him. It would be devastating for me when Mom was no longer here. We spent time together almost every day before my move, talked on the phone every evening. We enjoyed each other's company, so I had no regrets about choosing to be with her instead of somewhere else that Sunday. Late Monday afternoon and evening, I kept getting powerful urges to call her. That's odd, I thought; probably just my imagination. Regrettably, I dismissed those urges as foolish worry. I had, after all, just been there the day before, and our routine was for me to call her every other day during the week while I was out of town. For the last time in my life, I ignored my intuition!!! |
Site last updated on: 1/13/02